Time Flies

Time is going…fast.

Now this could, admittedly, be a good thing or not. If you are in a huge challenge or are suffering really badly, the quickness of time will speed up the recovery process as the deepest of your metaphysical wounds heal. If you have planned a vacation, the fast flow of events gets you there quickly.

And yet, when you are well, and choose to spend every day bumming around at home instead of doing something useful, the quickness of time will waste it all away. During your vacation, time will eat whatever adventure was not spent there.
Time goes by very fast.

My week sounds something like this: Monday—new week! Tuesday—enjoying it thus far…Wednesday—its midweek! Thursday—nearing the weekend! Friday—weekend! Saturday—party all day err day! Sunday—tomorrow’s yet another new week!

Whether you like it or not, soon it will be the major exams, and then they end. Soon enlistment will take place, and then it ends. Soon you enter university and before long you graduate.

Unless you have a purpose to live, there is practically no reason to. I find my reason in Christ, in knowing Him and making Him known, and that’s the basis on which I choose to live my life on, regardless of what particular event is going on.

Regardless, time will fly.

—Joel Kindiak, 14 Jun 17, 0729H

Death to Instagram


Initially I wanted to use ‘Death to Social Media’, but the problem with that is that I’m unwilling to part ways with Youtube or WordPress (for obvious reasons).

But yes, as the image macros have shown, I have not just deactivated my Instagram account but went one step further to delete it completely. The downsides weighed more than the upsides for me, and my flesh was overwhelmed by the temptation to scroll through ideal yet probably fake lifestyles and keeping up the image of mine. In contrast, once I deactivated my accounts and went for my Australia vacation, I was freed from the need to impress and in fact just need to enjoy my vacation in peace.

Now that I’m back I decided that browsing the lives of others only make me more jealous than inspired, as the craving for attention crept up within my soul once more. Let’s just kill it. So I decided to leave once and for all.

All the photos I keep on my phone will be just that for the purpose they serve: not to impress but for me to reminisce and reflect and be thankful for the year of abundant joy thus far, as well as the many years that have passed.

No couple Insta accounts.

No 21st birthday picture.

No vain inspirations.

It’s time to regain the privacy of my person and to love myself as God first loved me, that I may love others even more. I know that Instagram means different things to different people, and I respect that, but for me its toxicity relative to where I am now as a person overwhelmed its utility.

So, death to Instagram it is, for me at least.

-Joel Kindiak, 5 June 2017, 1129H

A Speck and a Plank

“And why do you look at the speck in your brother’s eye, but do not consider the plank in your own eye?…Hypocrite! First remove the plank from your own eye, and then you will see clearly to remove the speck from your brother’s eye.” ‭‭[Matthew‬ ‭7:3, 5‬]

Last night, I was outraged at my friends’ unavailability and unintentionality. I saw how it’s evident that this friendship wasn’t reciprocal, that some were putting in much more effort than others and that clearly not everyone prioritized one another. I even labeled them, in Moses’ words, “a stiff-necked people” whom I felt like simply giving up on.

Multiple times.

Then the Lord reminded me that I’m guilty of making the same mistake. It’s quite clear that Hope Church isn’t very high on my priority list, or at least the special events like conferences and camps, as I have lost sight of their value. Yet, my cell leader and mentor kept showing me grace in spite of my stiff-necked attitude to church.

Multiple times.

How can I remove the speck in the eyes of my brethren if if have a giant plank in mine? The fact is we are all struggling and growing together in this Christian walk, even when things get incredibly tough. It’s times like these when, after we release that anger, we find forgiveness and grace to show grace to our offenders.

Multiple times.

—Joel Kindiak, 27 May 2017, 0748H

29 April 2017

In my previous post, I lamented on how this day will be just another ordinary day that passes by without anyone knowing.

This weekend has completely proved me otherwise.

At the picnic that I organized, Alvin, Faith, Xin An and Ting Wei presented me with Alvin’s trademark birthday magazines, and we had an awesome impromptu photoshoot at Sentosa, followed by a sushi dinner and just enjoying one another’s presence. It was the perfect celebration I could ask for. I’m so glad my two groups of close friends finally get to meet each other and have fellowship, even if this is just the beginning.

xin an 8 faith 5 ting wei 8
On Saturday, my life group celebrated my birthday by organizing an Amazing Race full of Math questions. What blew me away was that it’s a team effort that brought this about, in spite of everyone’s hectic NS schedules. It wasn’t just the activity, but the teamwork behind it. That’s taking intentionality to a whole new level! And before the day ended, the Nice Hat guys came to surprise me. The surprise I finally and graciously received.

bravo 2 ting wei 9 xin an 10 may ann 2 justin 2-1
On Sunday, Bryan and Samuel treated me to lunch and Daniel and Jonathan spent time with me over dinner. This weekend sees my birthday the most celebrated in all 20 years, ever.

In Xin An’s words, “YOU SEE! PEOPLE DO CARE!” I guess it’s both a blessing and a slap in the face to stop doubting people so much.

One important thing is knowing that there are people who I can trust. For being there when I needed you the most, for hearing me in my romantic laments, for enduring my public embarrassments, for heeding my advice and for being my friends, thank you. You know who you are.

From the bottom of my heart, thank you for making my 20th the best one yet.

I’m grateful and incredibly humbled to be your friend. No joke.

Thank you.

image
—Joel Kindiak, 30 April 2017, 2213H

 

God’s Love

IMG_9560.JPG

In recent days the Lord has been unveiling a small sample of His heart toward me through my own experience.

He delights in every opportunity He gets to spend with me. Any time alone with Him was precious and cherished to the full. He feels honoured every time I hear Him preach through the various sources and speak through His word.

He loves to give and give and give and bless and bless and bless. Receiving His gifts with a resounding ‘Amen’ brings Him joy. He delights in giving to me. He delights in me being delighted.

When I’m down, He listens and tenderly speaks words of encouragement. He finds ways to make me laugh in my worst moments. He is relieved when I’m okay.

He is sad when I don’t want to spend time with Him. When I just use Him for His blessings. When I chase the world instead of Him. Yet, every time I run back to Him, He leaps for joy. He enjoys not the activities but the person with whom He does them with.

He loves to help. He loves to do whatever He can to solve my problem. He loves it when I ask Him for help, relying on His ability instead of on my own.

He is devastated when I lie to Him, saying that I don’t have time to spend with Him when in reality I have all the time in the world to do so. He is heartbroken when I go against my word. He feels betrayed that I care for someone else more than Him.

He longs to spend time with me. He longs to affirm me with words. He longs to serve me. He longs to embrace me. He longs to give good gifts to me.

He longs to love me in every way possible.

He rejoices when I return after turning away from Him from so long. He is excited to spend more time with me once again.

—Joel Kindiak, Jan 2017

 

Strong Grace

When in your sickness you know you have a healthy God whose healing power flows in you, you thank Him immensely.

When in your failure you know you have a successful God whose wisdom and intelligence will teach you, you thank Him incredibly.

When in your sin you know you have a righteous God whose grace and holiness has forgiven you completely, on firm and unshakable principle, you thank and worship Him infinitely.